Day 23, my first appt with our RE and NIAW’s Don’t Ignore…challenge

DAY 23:  Put your iPod on shuffle.  List the first 10 songs that play.

1. House of Balloons – The Weeknd

2. Club Paradise – Drake

3. Ode to LRC – Band of Horses

4. I’ve Got Your Number – Passion Pit

5. Baby, Its Cold Outside – Lady Antebellum

6. Try – Frank Ocean

7. Coyotes – Jason Mraz

8. Constellations – Jack Johnson

9. Take Me As I Am – Sugarland

10. Last Christmas – Glee Cast

So. We met with our RE and he thinks I don’t actually have PCOS. Ugh!!!! But immediately I was relieved and thought, “screw this diet!” But I’ve been feeling better on it and I think I’ll mostly stick to it.

So off to have our blood drawn he sent us! He requested the routine tests to confirm I’m healthy and immunized (and don’t have STDs) , plus AMH & bioavailable testosterone levels. He said he would do a lap if I want one, but suggested we do a baseline U/S with my next cycle and then do a lap if he sees anything suspicious. I’m ok with that right now.

Then he said he might want to do the saline hydrosonogram, but that he didn’t think the HSG would be necessary. Thank God.

He also wants to proceed with Clomid+IUI next cycle. Considering it’s only 1-2k and my insurance will pay half, I was totally all for it! But Hubster wants me to go on Clomid and try again with the timed intercourse. Especially because the RE told us that we should just wait to have sexytime when I get my +OPK.

So I’ve compromised with Hubster and said okay to 2 months of Clomid+timed intercourse. If no BFP, then we’ll go ahead with a max of 2 cycles of Clomid+IUI. And if that doesn’t work he wants to move on to IVF. Sooo yeah. It’s all getting real now.

I’m really emotional right now and stalking my chart like crazy. I really just want THIS to be the cycle. I don’t want to have to do any other interventions. I feel hopeful about the future, and even though my chart still looks good, I’m pretty sure we didn’t get enough sexytime in.

But one thing Mr. RE reminded me is that our whole relationship can’t revolve around TTC. Our sexytime (once fun and passionate) has now become “babymaking time.” We are rarely intimate outside of that one week each month and that’s a far cry from where we started! Not to make anyone gag, but in the beginning it was at least 3x/day!!!!

So thinking about what our marriage has become and NIAW’s challenge to not ignore infertility, I am inspired NOT TO IGNORE MY RELATIONSHIPS. Since I am spreading IF awareness across my FB-world and I am so deeply entrenched in IF, I will find some way to make my marriage and my life about more than TTC.

As far as Hubster and I go, maybe I will issue a house rule of no talking about anything related to babymaking and no blogging 1 day/week, plan a couple of short trips where there is no TTC talk, date night monthly, etc.

As far as friends go, there are a handful that I miss terribly. I will make an effort to escape my IF-cacoon and meet up with a friend at least twice/month. They all love me and want me to have children so much and just because none of them have struggled with IF, they are still there for me and praying for me. I love their babies and have missed watching them grow these last several months so I know it will feel good to be back in their lives and have them in mine.

So what will you challenge yourself not to ignore?!?

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16 thoughts on “Day 23, my first appt with our RE and NIAW’s Don’t Ignore…challenge

    • Because I don’t have the excess hair growth. I have some that I think is excess and I know none of my friends have, but he said it’s actually normal. And while I may not have full-blown PCOS, I have some symptoms of it. So like a mild case or just parts of it. I’m ok with that. It just means I’ll keep on my low-glycemic diet for health benefits and don’t plan on ovulating on my own. I can hope, but I won’t count on it.

  1. Wonderful that you have a plan… I always find that helps me to focus on other things while feeling less anxious. FXd for you xo

  2. Yeahhh it’s hard to avoid baby-making ruining your sex life. Especially with the timed-intercourse cycles. I hear that IUI cycles can be easier for your sex life since you don’t have as much pressure to have sex. There are other things you can do besides baby-making-sex that can definitely be reserved for non-baby-making-intimacy-time, if you find treatments really taking a toll on things.

    I second the question – why does your RE think you don’t have PCOS? Did they do an ultrasound? Or something else?

    • Yeah I think I need to start working non-baby-making-intimacy-time into our lives. Although my sex drive is a lot higher during this 2ww so that’s definitely been nice! Thanks for pointing that out!

  3. IUIs definitely are easier on intimacy for sure. Before we started fert treatments we also scheduled 1 day a week every week where it’s just us time no talk about ttc or IF. It helps us so much! I hope it will help you guys too! Best of luck!

  4. I agree with what everyone else has said. The IUI I had last month took SO MUCH pressure off our sex life! Also, have you checked out what Clomid can do to your cervical mucus? I would recommend doing some research on that. Once I learned, I said eff it and went straight for the IUI. Clomid isn’t the best thing to be putting into your body, so I figure the less of it I have to take, the better. Anyway, that’s just my humble opinion. I’m certainly no doctor 🙂 Good luck in whatever you and your hubs decide to do!

    • That’s exactly what I told Hubster. But he’s uber optimistic about us getting pregnant on our own. Hell, he even wants to forgo the Clomid for a couple of months to see if I’ll ovulate on my own. Since that was the original plan he is adamant about not doing IUI yet, I think I’d rather do that. But the impatient part of me really doesn’t want to. 😉 We’ll figure it out I guess. I just don’t know how to get him to wrap his head around the fact that we are doing ISN’T WORKING. And we need more help. I know he wants a baby as much (if not more) than I do, but he hasn’t accepted IF. 😦

  5. Your doc gave you great advice to not ignore the relationship or let TTC be all that you talk about and experience. The doc sounds like a great person! I’m right there with you on trying to focus on the intimacy rather than baby-making. It’s just so hard. Good luck with this cycle … may if be the last one before a baby.

    • Yeah, I get that. It took my husband a while to come around as well. Plus, the more interventions you use the harder it is to accept a negative pregnancy test. Besides, you can very well get pregnant on your own!

  6. The thing with clomid is that it can a) make you feel a bit crazy – for me it was PMT x 10, so everything you’re doing to help your relationship and get you back in touch with friends is fantastic to help that, b) its effects can be cumulative, so your second or third months might give you a better chance (in other words, try not to put pressure on you and hubs for this month to be the month – because I know that pressure and it can make you go even crazier), and c) most doctors won’t prescribe it beyond 6 months, because by then it can be affecting your cervical mucus, but I wouldn’t worry about it the first few months. Benefits outweighing risks and all that.

    Good luck!

    • yep, took clomid for 4 months previously and miraculously my lining and CM improved on it!!! everything else sucked big time though. thanks for caring enough to warn me about Evil Clomid though! 😉

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