I really don’t ask for much. I just want to be able to run. And make a baby. That’s all!
I recently had knee problems and worked really hard at strengthening and stretching my hip to help that. It worked and my knee stopped hurting. And then I started getting terrible pelvic pain (ovarian cysts?) and still couldn’t run. The pain decreased but then I started a dreadful period and have barely had the energy to make it through a full day at work so I haven’t run this week. And I was getting depressed.
Now I learn that my lining was 18mm on cd12! Ugh. So there was no way I was getting pregnant this month or probably even the last few months given my crazy heavy flows. So apparently I needed the lining-killing Clomid! Yep, I’m now fully depressed.
I haven’t been back to my fertility clinic because I hate it but obviously the monitoring would have been helpful to me. I am so frustrated, discouraged and feeling like an idiot to think I could do it on my own. I thought the Inositol (which helps regulate estrogen production) was helping me ovulate and we would be able to conceive without my clinic’s help. My Gyn also agreed to give me Clomid when I feel ready for that so I don’t have to go back to them (everything with my clinic, except IVF of course, is covered by insurance at 50% and nothing would be covered at a different clinic) so I was feeling really hopeful. Now, not so much.
It’s so crappy that we can’t afford good, thorough infertility care and I’m feeling frustrated and discouraged because we won’t be able to afford much else in the near future. Oh that and the fact that the women in my family go through menopause in their late 40s. Yeah. I’m fucked.
I have an email into my doctor so we shall see…