One dream infertility has cost me

Running through my pregnancy.

I’m an avid runner & half marathoner (only one-time marathoner bc of TTC for almost 4 years) and always envisioned being one of those crazy women running with a bump. I have always wanted to get the running shirts that say, “running for 2!” and the ones that have a baby footprint on the belly.

But no. Not with this $20k baby growing inside of me. There’s too much fear and worry with this IVF pregnancy. And even though I long to run just 2 or 3 slow daily miles to keep up my fitness and cardiovascular health, I doubt I can get myself to actually do it and I know Hubster would never be ok with it. It seems like a small sacrifice, but as the racing season and the Boston Marathon starts ramping up, I’m dying a little bit on the inside.

And I know I can end the year with a race after having this baby, but it makes me so sad not to run with this baby in my womb. It’s just another one of those dreams that have been unfairly taken away and I just need to whine a little to people who might understand.

22 thoughts on “One dream infertility has cost me

  1. I often wonder what I would be doing differently if this had all gone the way it was supposed to. The heartache, the money and time spent trying to get here has also made me cautious. I feel that maybe is has eased a bit now but it is always something I will carry around until this baby gets here.

  2. I feel the same way. I am a group fitness instructor and had to take a medical leave. I always imagined being the “crazy instructor” who taught to her due date, but I guess the universe had other plans. Just not worth the risk…

  3. AMEN sister, I had the same issue. But I did walk daily and as long as I walked fast enough it was enough to get my heart rate up some. It isn’t the same but beats nothing at all.

    • Yeah, I’ve not been able to walk like that the last week because I noticed the morning sickness would get worse. It seems to be better since I hit 12 weeks so I think I’m going to start walking and doing the elliptical soon!

  4. I get you. I was running 15 miles a week (which is a ton for me) before our last cycle. By the time my ovaries got down to size and I was cleared to run again, I was so damned sick there was now way that was happening. By the time I wasn’t sick anymore, I was 5 months along, and didn’t feel safe going back to running. Just be better than me and start back, BEFORE your little bits is 18 months old.

  5. i think it’s different for every woman, infertile or not, but honestly, exercise has been shown to be very good for both mother and baby. i’d talk about it with your OB – obviously if you’re having bleeding or other issues, then no. i didn’t feel well enough in 1st trimester to do much besides gentle yoga, but once the nausea lifted, and i got the all-clear from the OB, i started weightlifting, doing full inversions (handstands/headstands) in yoga, and stand-up paddling. it made a huge difference in how i felt (especially since i’d backed off so much on exercise prior to and during IVF), and is likely helping me control my blood sugars better than my doc was expecting (they were pretty sure i needed to start insulin very soon and so far i haven’t needed to). in any case, i hope you find an activity that you love as much as running that you can continue to stay active! i did give up aerial yoga and hoop for now – no way i could do those with this bump!

  6. That sucks. I’ve never seen running mommies…but I also don’t run, so maybe that’s why! Just remind yourself that once baby gets here, you can start running again…then you can get one of those running strollers and take the kids with you! πŸ™‚

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